Conversation with Dr. Valerie Correa, Psychologist & Marriage and Family Therapist
Conversation with Dr. Valerie Correa, Psychologist and Marriage and Family Therapist
The year before discovering she had acute myeloid leukemia, Val had already dreamt of a scenario in which she would live in a cabin on the grounds of a cancer retreat center founded by her. She planned to retire there and to live amongst the survivors in her cabin. Little did she know, however, that what she envisioned was prescient; within a year, she would be diagnosed with acute myeloid leukemia with a formidable prognosis. She was as close to death as any of the oncology doctors had ever seen in a new patient and needed to begin treatment immediately.
At the time she was diagnosed, she had a full psychotherapy practice including critically-ill cancer patients, and she was a full-time single parent too. Over the course of many months Val was treated for acute myeloid leukemia (survivor rate is 26% within 5 years) then in remission for several more until a relapse of acute myeloid leukemia again presenting on her skin first as leukemia cutis (with a survivor rate of 8%). Val survived treatment through a stem cell transplant and has been in full-remission for almost five years now
In that time, she has begun the realization of the Sunrise Daisy Retreat Center www.sunrisedaisy.org. Currently, Sunrise Daisy offers free mental health treatment, walking and writing groups for cancer survivors and is working towards raising funds to build a holistic retreat center offering healing treatments with acupuncture, yoga, qigong, sound and massage.
Val and I have known each other for almost nine years, she was my first supervisor when I moved to the Pacific Northwest from Texas. I felt lucky to know her, to be under the tutelage of someone who was gifted intellectually and emotionally. In our conversation for LYW, I was reminded of this, as we talked about how cancer has changed her life. As I wrote in a recent post, she said she’s learned to monitor her own energy, in and out, and to protect the choice to live in a willful way. She talked about a few of the initial findings of Sunrise Daisy clients; almost all were caregivers of some sort, such as a parent with a high needs child, a spouse of a chronically-ill partner, or a medical/health provider—people, mostly women, putting a lot of energy out for the care of someone else. It seems that protecting one’s energy, willfully, is bearing truth not just for Val but also for the patients her nonprofit sees.
Another discovery for Val was the reopening of conversations about the body. Many patients remember old feelings of shame, betrayal and trauma as there is so much new attention to their bodies. For Val, she remembers feeling a new appreciation for her “cellular being,” the smallest parts of her body banding together to give her life. Indeed, it was the communal effort of the tiniest parts of someone else’s body through a stem cell transplant that brought Val back from the brink of death. In looking back, Val also remembers that she “was never nice to my shell (my body). I always knew my core, I never felt my body represented who I felt like on the inside, (so) the body didn’t feel important; my heart, my brain, my spirit were all important, but I was dismissive of my body,” she said. In hearing her say this, I thought about what I’ve felt about my own body wishing it wouldn’t bother me with aches and pains, it’s size and shape, it’s softness, or the gradual effects of aging. I thought about other women too, how these are running conversations in our heads affecting how we feel, think and live.
We ended our conversation with how Val takes cares of herself. She talked warmly about her son, how he helps remind her to be spontaneous; she talked about her parents, the team for Sunrise Daisy, girlfriends, being alone to refuel and in nature, and with animals. She also finds great help and comfort from her acupuncturist and massage therapist. Taking care of her dream has been good for her too. She can’t wait to finally bring the dream of working from home at the Retreat Center to life.
On August 28thSunrise Daisy will be hosting a free one-day retreat offering massage, acupuncture, yoga, qigong, art therapy and sound healing along with talks on nutrition, sexuality, grief and loss and finances. If you or someone in your life could be helped by Sunrise Daisy, you can find more information about the one-day retreat at https://www.sunrisedaisy.org/ #liveyourwell